Gone

Wow...I can't believe how much time has gone by since my last post. Much has changed since January 28th. My world was rocked by the sudden, unexpected death of my dad on Feb. 10th. The reality of life without any parents has not completely sunk in yet, nor the circumstances surrounding my dad's death. It's still not real. I cannot get the picture of my dad out of my head because I was the one that found him in his condominium. How can he be gone, just like that???

The feeling of disbelief was overwhelming as I dialed 9-1-1 to alert the police to the situation that I walked into. The paramedics arrived followed by a police officer. I met them outside and directed them into my dad's condo. After the paramedics confirmed my dad's death, I was deluged by a series of questions. I methodically and stoically rattled off the pertinent information to the police officer and the two detectives that had just arrived on the scene. Name, address, phone number, date of birth.................I then matter-of-factly continued to provide the information about my father to them. I can't seem to get that image out of my head. Why was I the one that had to find him there????

We contacted the medical examiner - a necessary evil so that we would have an official time and date of death. Does it truly matter in the scheme of things. If you want to get technical, he actually died on Friday, Feb. 6th but we couldn't use that as the date because no one was present to provide an "official" t.o.d. (for those of you CSI watchers you know what I'm talkin' 'bout....time of death in case you were wondering). Anyway, I won't get into any more of the details. The only thing that matters is that he is gone, just like that.

Our life here on earth is just a vapor....nothing compared to what our lives will be in heaven. As I struggle to get that last image of my dad out of my mind, I turn to God for peace, healing and understanding. I dive into his Word so that I continue to be encouraged by His promises to His children here on earth. I've travelled down this road of grief before but this time, I am far more equipped because I have God alongside of me. Because of this, I am truly blessed. While I struggle to understand what has happened over the course of the last three weeks, I am reminded that God will never leave my side and that His ways are not my ways.